One of the nice things about serving on the board of directors is that I’m able to attend the annual Heartworks gala in Manhattan. It’s the night before our board retreat (read: two days of long meetings) and is our largest fundraiser event. I get to put on a pretty dress, which is especially big for me considering most days I’m pretty sure I don’t even brush my hair.

This year I have put on some weight (yay stress eating!) and needed a new dress. I tried this one on and fell madly in love with it. I think sometimes I dress older than I am, but this dress felt very “under 30,” and was overall just a departure from what I normally wear. I splurged and got my hair done, too.

Now, funny story here. See, I have a terrible track record with up-dos. I have a lot of thick hair and when hairdressers get ahold of it they freak out and feel the need to pull it tight and pile it up like a mound of poop on my head, or worse.

Junior year of high school, homecoming dance. First time getting my hair done. The woman actually uttered the words “I’m going to try something I’ve never done before.” When I finished, my mom gasped, called her friend Marysue, and we immediately drove several towns away for Marysue to attempt to fix my hair before my date picked me up. She made a valiant effort.

Senior year prom I went to a different salon, picture in hand. The woman in the photo had her hair divided into three strands and sort of twisted together in a very simple updo. Somehow, the hairdresser translated it into this. Most heard comment that evening? “Wow! Your hair is really…interesting!”


We can’t forget the Snowball dance my junior year of college. My friend Sarah dubbed this “Little Bo Peep On Acid.” It was a disastrous attempt at getting our hair done for cheap and even two friends working on it in the Fat Fish Blue restaurant bathroom while we waited on dinner to arrive couldn’t fix the nightmare wreaked upon my hair.

No, that’s not a shadow framing my head in the photo…that’s literally my hair. And in the back it was sort of folded in on itself in this weird partial knot…? My mom still almost pees herself from laughing whenever she thinks about this.

These are just a few highlights of my traumatic hair stories. So originally for this gala, I planned to use one of those bun wrap things and do my hair myself but – you guessed it – I had too much hair. I found myself making an appointment for an updo at the cheapest nearby salon.

I came armed with a photo of a fellow latina: Eva Longoria. I wanted a simple, loose chignon.

When I arrived at the salon I was overjoyed to see it was run by Latinas! Surely they had hair like mine and would know what to do with it!

Um, no. I showed the hairdresser the picture of Eva and explained that I wanted something simple and loose. After 5 minutes, she complained “your hair is so thick!” and brought in a second hairdresser. They argued over my hair in Spanish for awhile before the second hairdresser declared my hair too thick for a chignon. But, she told me, “I have a plan.”

Cue the feelings of terror.

My hair was exactly the opposite of what I’d wanted: complicated and literally waxed to my head. But, I actually really liked it! Hooray for a break in the bad up-do curse!

As for the gala itself, it was excellent! James Naughton was our MC for the evening. I was sitting at the best table in the room and made a new friend (Hi, N.!). Plus, we raised $1 Million! Congratulations and thank you to the Heartworks committee, who puts a lot of work into this event every year, and thank you to everyone who came and gave money to make it a success!