Musings of a Marfan Mom

Hoping for a 3rd!

| 18 Comments

We’re adopting!

Or, at least, hoping to adopt!

A little over a month ago Mark and I decided to get the ball rolling on the adoption process. Adoption is something we’ve talked about since pretty early in our dating relationship. We weren’t sure if I’d be able to have biological children, giving having Marfan syndrome, and knew that even if I could, I likely wouldn’t be able to have more than one or two. We felt so blessed when I was cleared for my first pregnancy, M, and over the moon when we were given the go ahead to try for #2. After J was born, it wasn’t a surprise that my team strongly recommended against any more pregnancies.

I’d be lying if I said I don’t sometimes feel a twinge of sadness at the thought of never being pregnant again, but I am so excited for us to add to our family through adoption. I know there is one more baby out there for us somewhere. I said as much to Mark when still in the hospital with J. We know our family just isn’t quite complete yet.

After a lot of online research, talking with friends, and prayer over the past few years, we’ve decided to pursue open domestic infant adoption through our church’s agency. For those who don’t know, open adoption means that we maintain some sort of relationship with the prospective birth mother/birth parents/birth family. This may be just periodic emails and pictures, to frequent visits, or anything in between.

Right now we’ve completed the first round of paperwork, as well as our orientation. We’re in the middle of our required readings (our agency uses readings online in leu of a class) and then we’ve got lots more paperwork, interviews, and our home study before final approval from the agency. After that, it’s waiting to be chosen by a prospective birth mother/birth parents. How long all this will take is incredibly variable. I know the Menininho is hoping it won’t be long! He says he is excited to have a baby sister, and that her name is Emily, haha.

I’ll keep you all posted as we move along this adoption journey. I’d love to hear any suggestions of resources or advice from any of you who are part of the adoption triad!
Father & sons

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18 Comments

  1. Congrats! We can’t wait; please let us (me & Scott) can do to help with the process!!

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  2. Oh Maya! That is wonderful news.
    I wish you all the best for your “pregnancy” and that you will find “your” 3rd child very, very soon.
    Love from Germany
    Eva

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    marfmom Reply:

    Thank you Eva!

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  3. Congrats on wanting to add to the family! I have a ton of open adoption supporters (birth mothers and adoptive parents) on my twitter feed…if you want me to I’ll do a shout out on twitter to hook you up that way (but know they are for adoption reform, especially where open adoption is concerned as well as respectful language when speaking of potential birth parents).

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  4. Maya,

    You and Mark never cease to amaze me! Good luck in the process.

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  5. That’s awesome news! Being adopted myself I’ve thought about adoption as an option before. I’m very thankful for my two beautiful daughters and our family feels pretty complete. I think you guys would be amazing parents to andth at little one couldn’t get more blessed. Goodluck with everything!!!

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  6. That is wonderful news, Maya! I will pray that the process goes smoothly.

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  7. Congratulations Maya and Mark. I hope that all the paperwork and such go through quickly. You will be great parents for the third child. And, you know what? It is sad no matter how long you have been married when you realize you won’t be having any more babies, no matter how many you already have. Best of luck.

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  8. love. i know several people who have used the church’s adoption services with wonderful results. what a lucky baby to be a part of your family!

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  9. Good luck! It’ll be quite the adventure! I hope you get to have the family you want!

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  10. SO excited for you guys! <3

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  11. My cousin, Sally, adopted two baby boys. The oldest, Dave, is the adoptive father of one fantastic young lady who came from Russia. Our family strongly supports adoption and I’ll be happy to help in any way I can! Congratulations to you all!

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    marfmom Reply:

    Thank you!

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  12. Good luck with everything!

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    marfmom Reply:

    Thanks!

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  13. YAY!!! I found you via Love that Max, so I wanted to say hi, and it turns out you’re discussing one of my FAVORITE topics. Adoption! Check out Reece’s Rainbow (www.reecesrainbow.org) It has a ton of kids with special needs. Kids with special needs get sent to mental institutions in a lot of other countries around 3/4, so it’s a dire situation for many of them.

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    marfmom Reply:

    Nice to meet you! Reece’s Rainbow does some really great work.

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